12-19-09

I miss you Jamie.  Merry Christmas.  How wonderful for you to be with the birthday boy.

O Holy Night

12-3-09

“Fix your thoughts on whatever is true, and honorable, and right, and lovely, and pure, and admirable.  Think on things that are excellent and worthy of praise.  Keep putting into practice everything you received from me–everything you heard from me and saw me doing.  Then, the God of peace will be with you. “ Philippians 4:8-9

11-14-09

I’m sitting outside on this gorgeous day and thinking about Jamie.  When I look at the sky I always imagine what he is doing and how happy and joyful he is in heaven.  Today I came across a book that’s been on my husband’s shelf for 10 years, but I never paid any attention to. It’s a compilation of different pastor’s sermons on heaven. I pulled it down and began reading some interesting things about heaven, some I knew, some I didn’t.  Did you know the Bible does give us the actual location of heaven?  According to Isaiah 14, it is in a fixed location in the sides of the North, beyond the highest star.  I don’t know why, I just thought this was really cool to know.  I love learning about heaven, as i realize that is my real, eternal home.  All that I do here, is to prepare for there, where we will all be together forever in the presence of God.  We just have this short time on earth to make a difference.  One by one, we will join him, until then, he is cheering us on in our own race!!!!  I love you Jamie!  Thanks for cheering us on!  Luke 15:10, Hebrews 12:1

I Am In Heaven

By Becky Coxe

I am now in heaven–the gates have opened wide–

And now I have the privilege of walking by His side.

The angel choir is singing, and the music is so sweet;

I’ll join them just as soon as I have worshipped at His feet.

I am now in heaven, and the blood-washed throng is here.

I recognize a lot of them–there’s not a single tear.

There’s joy beyond description and reunions by the score;

There’ll be no separations, for we’ll be here evermore.

I am now in Heaven–please wipe away your tears!

I’ve fought the battle, run the race–I’m rid of all my fears.

There is no pain or sorrow here; the heartaches now are past;

I’ve read and sung of Heaven, and now I’m here at last!

I am now in Heaven, and, oh, the place is grand!

No one could ever tell me all the beauties of this land.

Since I cannot describe it, you’ll have to come and see

That it was worth the trials to live here eternally!

11-3-09

We will be part of a relay race for the American Cancer Society coming up in May.  If you would like to join Team Jamie or make a contribution, please see the link below.

Team Jamie

 

10-3-09

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMIE!

Jamie would have been 43 years old today.  We celebrated with a balloon launch at the cemetery followed by lunch together.  It’s so hard to believe on this day last year we were having a bonfire at my sister’s house, with no idea he was even sick, much less so severely.  I was 2 weeks from giving birth  and defied my doctor’s orders in traveling to OH that week-end….  I’m so glad I did.  We joked that if I went into labor Jamie would throw his siren on top of his Blazer and drive me to my hospital in KY.  He drove my kids through the woods in a golf cart, and nearly drove them off a bridge:)  We had a wonderful time.  That’s nothing compared to the party he’s having today.    We love and miss him so.

Happy Birthday Brother!

9-22-09

“Now we live with great expectation, and we have a priceless inheritance–an inheritance that is kept in heaven for you, pure and undefiled, beyond the reach of change and decay.  And through your faith, God is protecting you by His power until you receive this salvation, which is ready to be revealed on the last day for all to see.  So be truly glad.  There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while.  These trials will show that your faith is genuine.  It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold–though your faith is far more precious than mere gold.  So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.  You love Him even though you have never seen Him.  Though you do not see Him now, you trust Him; and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy.  The reward for trusting Him will be the salvation of your souls.”  I Peter 1:4-9

A little over a year ago, I heard from God in my spirit during my usual prayer time.  He gave me a sense that cancer would come to my family.  I didn’t know who it would be, or when it would come, but 3 things were very specific.  The word was cancer was coming, our faith would be severely tested, but we would overcome.  This happened on 3 separate occasions.  I wasn’t startled or even very concerned at the time.  In my humanness I assumed it would be me, and a long, long time away.  I had no idea it would be my brother in just 3 short months.

When Jamie was diagnosed in November, my times of prayer immediately came to mind.  I remembered what God had spoken to my spirit.  Again, in my humanness, I translated the message…..okay, our faith will be severely tested (which I assumed was Jamie’s illness), but we will overcome (which I assumed to be his earthly healing).  So, when April 23 came about, none of this made sense to me.  This didn’t add up to what I was believing.  This didn’t add up to what God had spoken to me.  What do I do with this now?  I was so confused, (which is not of God my friends).  Since that day, I have made a choice to communicate openly with God about my feelings.  When I was angry, I told Him.  When I was sad, turned to Him.  When I was confused, I read His Word (which the enemy tried to use to confuse me more).  Then one day, while sitting with friends in a Beth Moore study on the book of Daniel, God healed my confusion.  I want to share with you what I learned so that maybe it can help someone else, with this trial, or another.

When one of God’s children faces a fiery trial (such as facing a possible malignancy), there are 3 scenarios to consider:

Scenario A:  We can be delivered from the trial.  We pray, asking  a believing for healing until God tells us differently.  Maybe we find out it is benign, or the tumor disappears all together.   During this time our faith is built. This is a wonderful miracle, and one we all would all desire, but it is not necessarily life-long lasting.

Scenario B:  We can be delivered through the fire.  We continue to pray, ask, and believe until God tells us differently (as he did with Paul).  Maybe we endure countless treatments and times of suffering, and come out with a clean bill of health.  During this time our faith is refined. We as Christians cannot be exempt from ever going through trials of fire, because then our faith would never be refined.

Scenario C:  We can be delivered by the fire, into the arms of God. This my friends, is when our faith is perfected. We are all going home some way……”and the last enemy to be destroyed is death.”  I Corinthians 15:26

In Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego told Nebuchadnezzar that their God would rescue them, but even if he didn’t, they would never bow down and worship his gods or statue. (Daniel 3:18)  When we’re not delivered from or through the fire, what god are we tempted to bow down to?  Bitterness?  Unbelief?  Hatred?  Not me.  I will not bow to another god.

I am so thankful God spoke His truth to my human mistranslations.  Cancer did come to my family, and our faith has been severely tested.  Jamie’s test was his illness, and he passed it with flying colors, clinging to his Savior until his very last breath.  His faith was perfected into the arms of God.  I am so proud of him every day for the way he faced his fiery furnace.  He overcame by not bowing to bitterness and unbelief.

Our test, is not Jamie’s illness, but his death.  though we still cry when we think of him, and grieve as we miss him so much, we are not alone.

“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.  I have called you by name; you are mine.  When you go through deep waters, I will be with you.  When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown.  When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.  For I am the lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.”  Isaiah 43:1-3

By keeping our eyes on Jesus, we will overcome.  Overcome oppression, overcome depression, overcome temptation to bow down to anything other than God.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up, and let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.  We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.  Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame.  Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.  Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people, then you won’t become weary and give up.”  Hebrews 12:1-4

Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross.  We have that same joy awaiting us, and we can endure this trial.  And in time, our circumstances, can become a servant of the gospel, if we’ll allow it as Paul did, (Philippians 1:12).

I humbly thank you Lord, for your patience with me, your mercy on me, and your gigantic shoulders that continue to handle my emotional pleas for your help.  Thank you for bringing another piece of healing to my heart at an unexpected time in an unexpected way.  Please give Jamie hugs and kisses for me and tell him that I love him, miss him, and can’t wait to see him again.

8-28-09

“I am convinced that we are giving Satan far too much credit for having some semblance of heart.  Please understand, Satan has no heart.  We find a strange and deceptive comfort in imagining that Satan would draw the line at certain limits and act appropriately.  For instance, we mistakenly assume that surely satan would leave us alone in our heart-rending grief because, after all, he knows we’re defenseless and weak.  Wrong.  Where was satan when Christ was in the wilderness of temptation, starving and alone?  Right there with Him.  Luke 4:13 concludes the record of Christ’s temptation with the harrowing words:  ”When the devil had finished all this tempting, he left him until an opportune time“.  Where was the devil when Christ was in Gethsemane, grieving and pouring sweat-drops of blood?  Putting his final touches on the trap he had set up through his puppet, Judas.  Luke 22:3-6 says, “Then satan entered Judas, called Iscariot, one of the Twelve.  And Judas went to the chief priests and the officers of the temple guard and discussed with them how he might betray Jesus.  They were delighted and agreed to give him money.  He consented, and watched for an opportunity to hand Jesus over to them when no crowd was present”.

Satan is an opportunist. Would he come after you while you are down?  In a heartbeat….if he had a heart.  Let’s wake up from our deceptive slumber and open our eyes to the fact that satan is the one behind every childhood victimization, every suicide, and every scandalous fall of a righteous man.  The word “appropriate” isn’t in his vocabulary.  He’s not polie, and he doesn’t give us room to grieve and wait until we’re on our feet again so we can have a fair fight.  Satan fights dirty.  Please believe it.  I know that most of us would rather not have to think about warfare when we are grieving the death of a loved one but–somehow, some way–we are very wise to muster the energy to take these protective measures:

*  pray for protection through our season of grief

*pray for healthy grief

*surrender our grief to God, so satan can’t get a foothold

*call on warring intercessors to pray for us in our weakness

*keep lines of communication open with God, even when all we can say is “Help!” or “Why?”

*believe God’s Word that tells us He can and will restore abundant life…if we’ll let Him”

—Praying God’s Word by Beth Moore

8-25-09

Word of God Speak by Mercy Me

8-5-09

As time goes on, I miss my brother more and more.  I’ve never gone this long without seeing him in my life, and I can’t believe I can’t just pick up my phone and call him.  Still, I think of him in heaven, and know he is so happy, so healthy.  I received a card from some friends recently that really touched my heart.  It said that 3 Gideon Bibles had been placed in memory of Jamie.  Gideon Bibles are used in hotels, prisons, hospitals, schools, etc in order to advance God’s Kingdom.  I thought how much Jamie would love to know that he continues to have a hand in the spread of God’s Word.   There are so many others in this world who are suffering, whether from a physical illness, a loss, economic hardship, depression, relational distress, and the list goes on.  My family recognizes how blessed we are to have each other during such hard days.  Right now, I often wish I could be in another spot in time.  If only I could turn back the clock to a year ago; I was 7 months pregant and we  were celebrating my sister’s wedding.  We  were anticipating Jamie and Jessie’s wedding.   Everyone was so happy.  Then, knowing I can’t change what has passed, I wish I could fast forward through this year.  To be done with all the “firsts” without him.  It seems better to be in any spot but this one where there is so much pain and sadness.  But, we are not alone.  We have our Saviour who has walked before us, walks beside us, and will lead us back into joy.  We are also not alone because there are so many others who have been through or are currently going through similar trials.  

I would like to introduce you to a girl named Amy Ramba.  I used to work with Amy’s brother, Jeff Rhinehart.   Jeff was a vibrant, pleasant, wonderful family man who loved Jesus and it showed in his spirit. Jeff fought a malignant brain tumor valiantly, and in September of 2006, he went to heaven.  His sister, Amy, found out while Jeff was ill that she had breast cancer while still in her 20’s.  She is now battling it for the 3rd time and is having some issues with it in her bones.  Amy kept a website for Jeff and after he passed, I continued to follow the site to see how the family was doing.  Amy was my inspiration for setting up and maintaining a blog for my brother.  Though we have never met in person, we have e-mailed and spoken on the phone.  Amy is a prayer warrior and she joined us in praying for Jamie diligently, while she herself continues to battle cancer.  If you’d like more of her story, you can follow her posts at this site:

www.jeffrhinehart.com

There are many others who could use our prayer and support.  If you would like to share your own story, please feel free to post it as a comment.  We are not the only ones suffering.  I continue to pray for those listed on the prayer request page.  I have recently heard fantastic reports for 3 of these friends!!!  It is an honor to pray for such wonderfully brave and strong people.

7-22-09

Last night I was having a difficult night.  I had printed pictures that had been saved to my computer for a while, but never made it to the printer.  Some were photos people have sent to me of Jamie. I then looked back at some of my older photo albums at pictures I haven’t seen in a long time, some I didn’t even remember that I had.  When I look at his face, I just can’t believe he isn’t here anymore, and reality sets in again.  When I opened my Bible, I turned to Colossians 3 and it was exactly what I needed to read at that moment.  Then, in talking to my husband, he said the most beautiful words to me.  He said “God hasn’t forgotten any of the tears you’ve cried in the past 8 months.  He has bottled every single one.”  Those words penetrated my heart with such comfort.  When I sat down to my computer tonight, I opened my Bible to this exact passage.  I hope it brings you the comfort of God’s presence as it has me.  

“You keep track of all my sorrows.  You have collected all my tears in your bottle.  You have recorded each one in your book.  My enemies will retreat when I call to you for help.  This I know; God is on my  side!  I praise God for what He has promised, Yes, I praise the Lord for what He has promised.  I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?  What can mere mortals do to me?  I will fulfill my vows to You, O God, and will offer a sacrifice of thanks for your help.  For you have rescued me from death; You have kept my feet from slipping, So now I can walk in your presence, O God, in your life-giving light.”  Psalm 56:8-13